Over, it is..!!

Four years of engineering has been a long road to hike through. It is over finally; people from other towns are heading back home. And today we said bye to the first of such fellow beings in class. A congregation of about twenty heads had assembled to bid farewel to this guy. All of us had fun in our own way at the party held. I hardly spoke to anyone for a long time. I did not want to be there for several reasons initially; was purely disinterested. So stayed aloof with a sullen mood, talking and laughing with only the ones that mattered to me most.

This classmate had his departure scheduled for 9PM or so. And at about 7:30PM everyone present gathered in a circle around him. He was forced by enthusiastic cheers to address us all. He conceded after a minute or two. His speech was brief, hardly lasted a few lines. He dindn't make much of an impression with what he said at all I thought. The same things "I will miss all of you" and so on, cliched words and expressions. Before I knew it, his speech was over. I smirked at it. All i saw was a thin line up of words, inefficiently thrown into a so called speech.

The moment arrived and he had to leave to make it to the bus stop. At that point of time i heard someone behind me mention he will not come back to Bangalore. He will stay with parents in his hometown, till his visa stamping is done and then...... He will fly to the USA to sculpt a brighter future. Now the lights flashed and cameras did some talking, click, click, click!! All his close friends crowded around him doing their absolute best to keep that smile on for the perfect picture. It struck me at snail's pace that there were quite a bunch who will genuinely miss this chap and mourn the lack of his presence. It touched me though i was not one of that pack.

It was a little hard to find my voice again and finally make my way to wish him luck and happiness. As he left most of the guys in the gathering started out with him to take him to board the bus. And in a feeble voice I heard him say "It's ok you guys, dont take the trouble of coming." because parting was difficult for him too, which was the reason he had not been able to deliver a word studded speech. Some girls were crying, since college was over and one by one all of us would go our own ways, that had begun now. Others were crying because their friend was leaving. And three girls, me included had much joking and laughing to do, to cheer some of them up.

Finally all of us decided to go home for the night. I waited at a stop nearby for a long time in order to catch a bus back home. My enthusiasm had been dampened by the incident; dint feel good at all somehow. There will be very few people other than family who will probably miss me if I go away some place else for a living. That small beloved circle will consist of only two from my class. Somehow never did gel with the rest. They were too different for me and my mates. So just the three of us have had our own little world. We interacted with everyone in class though, spoken to many at length at several occasions. But there hasn been a 'bond' established as such. No one is to be blamed here, ways of people in the world are myriad. Thus our ways are valid and so is that of the rest of my class.

My feeling was one that of despair as i clambered onto a bus full of people. I have managed to have sensible and memorable times and friends in only about 2-3 in the entire class of 55 odd members, statistically this is such a petty number. The rest belong to 'just another classmate' league. What made me so depressed is that I am 'just another classmate' to these people as well,, no more than that...! In four years, I hardly have gotten to know people of my own class.

There is a snug sense of belonging when I walk into that place, my college.. It is cozy home for me. And there is an important corner in this beautiful home of mine, where I do not feel too much at home! Its a sinking feeling, the more I think about it more I slip into the abyss.....